Last Minute?

I have prided myself over the years as being someone who tries to plan ahead and be on time to events, especially the ones that I have planned. God has placed me in the center of a couple of different cultures that are totally different from my personal time zone awareness. I know that being punctual for some is right up there next to being almost like God. I also know that in some cultures being late or not the first one at a party or event is not a bad thing.

So here are a couple of lessons that are helping me enjoy life more, still be productive and see people connect. I am usual not one to cancel an event or change it. Yet, I see that at times it is better to be more concerned about an individual then being on time or doing an event. I also know that it is irritating when some wants a ride and really believes that your world should revolve around them. I have also had the experience of coming to someone’s rescue only to discover that they have already gotten help and just didn’t have a phone to call – oops.

I think the real issue is how I choose to view people who are always late, slow and forgetful. It is very easy to have this superior than thou type of attitude. I slip from living by grace and mercy to being a clock-watcher. Obviously those who are timely and follow through do at times receive blessings or advantages over those who choose to snooze. I usually tell everyone if you snooze you loose or the early bird does catch the worm. None of this is really that difficult to understand until it comes to the way others choose to live.

I make it a part of my routine to drop in on lots of different people in my neighborhood on a weekly basis. It does happen that I get too busy or am gone for some reason. It is easy for some of my special friends to think that I have forgotten them. What always amazes me is the call I get from a few to say hey or how are you doing. It reminds me that others do see and care about how you choose to use your time.

It is difficult for someone who is always late to change a little much as it is difficult for me to purposely be late or slow to something. The good news is that God is never late and his timetable is always perfect!

Planning

I tend to pride myself on being prepared and always thinking both forward and backward. Yet, the reality for me is that life is often lived at the moment and not everyone uses their i-calendar like me. It requires a little bit more faith and trust of our Father in heaven. I tend at times to put more faith in myself then in God. Yes, I am admitting to this up front.

The exciting news is that God is faithful even when others are flakes and don’t return calls or e-mails. I am learning that it is important to plan, include others, promote and remind people all of the time. So yes that last minute phone call is important or the note that I left in someone’s door is actually read. The personal downside, which I know but don’t want to admit, is that everyone’s life doesn’t revolve around me.

I know that God ultimately will bring things together in a way that does show forth his purpose and does impact my neighborhood. It is difficult to trust others who you know might not follow through or would seldom take pride in what they do. The obvious lesson is that it is essential for others to learn even if it is through failing. The only way I can learn at times is to fall flat on my face and then have to pick myself back up. No one likes to be analyzed or critiqued by anyone yet; the reality is that this is how we grow the most.

So yes I live in a world that isn’t totally run by white color educated types that thrive on being timely. I know that one of the better approaches that will promote better health is to see that manana manana is sometimes the solution to being too tied to the clock or bottom line. People are more important than selfish results.

It is always fun to mix it up and be on time when you are always late or if you are a time fanatic then to choose to be late can be refreshing for someone who is always running behind.

Multi-Colored

I am slowly learning about building relationships with people that are different from my normal comfort zone. We love to do gatherings at our house with both youth and adults. So once a month we host a Sunday bbq to create a setting where people and youth can interact and potentially make new friends and learn from one another.

This last Sunday we had one of our bbq’s and had a great turnout. I had asked some different friends who did come so we had one of my painting grandmas, a single Hispanic dad with three little kids, his mom (Spanish speaking only), an African American dad whose daughter brought him, the normal group that helps and then a couple of neighbors in addition to about 25 of our youth. We were spread through out the house, back and front yard. We had a great meal that everyone brought something to share. It was great to watch one of my good friends and wife, who are grandparent types, interact with Mrs. Jefferson and Daniel my African American dad who definitely didn’t fit but came.

There was a side of me where I was thrilled to see such a varied group gathered at my house. Another side where I was a little ticked at some of my friends for not being as outgoing and friendly with new people. I know that it isn’t natural for someone to hang out with someone who is totally different. Then the reality of family battles also hit. One of our families that we are helping big time is at war with another key family in our group over a dog. So because of this the other family couldn’t stay. This was and is maddening to see one lady have a restraining order against another family. The dad of the other family has actually helped this other family with a group that did some cleanup.

Our ‘live in’ college student, Terrance, had invited over the kids of a single parent friend. He is a young guy and had actually agreed to watch all four of them. As is usual with little kids they got into in with each other, made a mess and were loud. Terrance was pushed to his limit.

After all of our gatherings there is always a mess to cleanup. Sometimes there is trash all over the place other times its not to tough to clean up. I was taking home a group of youth and just as we are finishing dropping everyone off a little boy gets into it with a girl over something really silly. Everyone is quiet as I pull over the van and get them to stop punching each other. No one is hurt but it just reinforces the reality that I live in a spiritual war zone where people of difference colors tend to want to fight and not give up unless they win.

I have been personally hurt by a few that all of a sudden decide that I am playing favorites with someone and they really believe that I have ignored them or not given them attention. There is one situation where a relative of someone, I didn’t know, accuses me of being disrespectful. I talk with the mom who has decided to ban her kids from all of our activities. She acts as if I have done nothing wrong to offend and it is just because of needing more rest and time to get ready for school.

The journey continues as I discover that God is color blind or has purposely made all of us different for a purpose not an accident. Sometimes I wish I were black or brown and not white.

One Thing After Another

I know at times I admit that I get frustrated with people who seem to stop living and ultimately quit with life. We have gone downtown during the summer every week to hand out cold bottled water. Seldom do I ever see the same person and only once has someone actually called me to follow through. Much in the same sense this last week I was around a couple of different individuals who gave up on living. I can’t fathom want it would be like to want to take your own life but on the same weekend I was around people who were at the end of their ropes.

I understand in my own life the sense of having too much to do, little time and little resources. I have gotten involved with being my dad’s caretaker and it pushes me to my limits. I assume too much, have to be the ‘bad guy’ at times and then there is always something that needs to be done.

I had never met Ricardo until last Wednesday when he went to the pool with a group from New City/Barrio Nuevo. I had been told by a few that he had just been beaten up and needed some help and maybe even a place to stay. We talked a little bit and he didn’t seem to far out but then who can tell a person’s real heart.

We went out for dinner with some great friends on Friday night at an Ethiopian Restaurant. I got a few calls from one of my kids and finally got the message that Ricardo was in the hospital. So I called and got the impression that he wasn’t there or he had a different name. After I realized that he was in the Behavioral Unit I got through. We talked a little. It ended up that a group of us went to see him on Sunday night after church. We were fortunate to be allowed to have a group of 8 visit with him, especially when most of them were minors.

I talked a little with him by himself and shared the gospel and asked his permission to talk more and bring some of the kids in to see him. He seemed like he was doing better but obviously had just attempted to overdose on meds a few days ago. We went by his apartment that night only to discover that someone had kicked down his door and ransacked his place.

I returned the following day to bring him his clean clothes, a Bible and a couple of books to read. We talked a little and I again prayed with him to help him get his focus on God. Now he is in a waiting pattern until the Hospital decides the best treatment.

We do live in a broken world where many are out to harm those who are different or that they just don’t like the way you look. I am learning that God values all life, especially those of the forgotten, orphan and widow. As I finished an e-mail to a friend that I had to cancel lunch he said, “Yeap, it is always one thing after another!”

D___N Dog

It has been a crazy couple of weeks with great things happening but also unfortunate things taking place. My purpose in writing this blog is to talk briefly about how anger issues and tempers out of control cause sooo much drama and trouble.

Everyday as I drive around in my larger neighborhood there are always stray dogs and cats. My wife has the gift of picking up and caring for strays. It is never convenient and seldom do we find their owners. Sad to say many have been abandoned and left out on the street. As the summer temps begin to rise it is sad to see dogs literally dying from dehydration.

I always seem to find myself in the middle of a fight between different parties that I have been doing things with over the last couple of years. This last month there has been a dogfight between a couple of families that is truly sad. I know that it is easy for one family to loose a dog or cat then for another family to literally adopt the lost pet not knowing that a nearby neighbor is missing their beloved pooch. About eight months ago there was a stray little terrier that we found during the tutoring club. We ended up giving it to one of our families who has lots of dogs. The older teen in the house became very attached to it. The little pooch actually had puppies which were given to a good home of someone that lives in California. I really hadn’t thought much about the original owner of this little fluff ball.

Now the drama begins. The little mom runs away and is gone. We end up painting the house of another family in our group. As I am doing prep for this house I see a little pooch in their backyard that could be a twin of this other dog. We do a big volunteer push and have 70 plus people helping with this house and another and do a lunch in the adjacent park. It is during this time that the other family notices the dog and issues start to happen. It is only a few weeks after the house painting that the little pooch runs away and ends back at the other families’ house.

As the story unfolds we have a July 4^th celebration with lots of people, waterslide, Phoenix Fire department and a barbecue lunch. I have a family emergency that day; my dad had broken his hip and is being taken into surgery at the last minute so I leave the party in the park in the capable hands of some great volunteers. After I get back that night I ask one of my board members how everything went. It was almost is if this was normal fare for the day he mentions that a fight erupted between two older ladies over a dog. The police were called but the crowd at the park didn’t seem to react.

It turns out that one of the families I am in the process of helping significantly and know that I am going to have to talk with them about the dog incident. Much like the other family is also involved in everything we do. So I end up talking with everyone amidst tears and screams. If all of this wasn’t enough, the dog escapes again and ends back up at the other family, who had cared for the dog and helped with its puppies. We are having a group from LA help with doing urban missions and it is during a lunch at this one house that a lady police officer knocks at the door and asks to talk with me. This other individual was now accusing someone of leaping her fence to take the dog. Ouch! What do I do I am in the middle of this and seriously don’t believe that anyone would do this. So because there is no evidence of anything the Police Officer leaves. The moment after she leaves I realize that the dog had run back to this house early in the morning. The dad of the house now takes charge and takes the dog back to the other house and attempts to explain the situation.

I know that forgiveness and reconciliation don’t happen easily and especially without God’s help. No I am assuming this other family won’t ever talk to me again but I end up helping them in a crisis and this person admits to their anger issues and overreacting in the situation. My hope now is to get everyone together to continue the process of reconciliation.

Yes, living in the hood has its moments where I want to scream and say God why can’t anyone be normal. Yet, if someone took my puppies or my big dog I wouldn’t be any different. I would fight to get them back and also be very emotional. The real issue at hand is why don’t we get just as worked up about the mess around us that we cause by our selfish and sinful actions. I think of Jesus’ response to Simon the expert in the law and the prostitute that the one who has been forgiven much can love much. So ergo the one who doesn’t admit to having an anger issue is less likely to understand and practice grace and mercy.

Grace and Peace - Dave

Life on the Edge

I know that everyone at times loves to have an adrenalin rush. The challenge is that we can’t always live life in the fast lane neither can we live life in neutral. I continue to be amazed at what God does in spite of my lack of faith or willingness to trust him. As I walk the journey of doing church and mercy work in South Phoenix I long for real friendships of people who live here that have a heart for those who are part of the fabric of the South Mountain Community. Yesterday I finally connected with someone who is just that, Reginald.

I have often wondered why I ended up in the South Ranch Habitat Community and why the connectedness to a few that make it so easy to love and care for this community. Just in the same vein I wondered why we painted Mrs. Jefferson’s house last January. Now the pieces to the puzzle are being to take shape. As I talked to Reginald it made sense that everyone that I have gotten to know in the last year are part of his life in South Phoenix. He has the connections and passion for this neighborhood. He knows Bookie’s dad and brother. They all got in trouble together. He understands the gang and drug side of this area.

I had met Reginald’s aunt, Cynthia, after the painting blitz. We have met a few times and shared our dreams about impacting our neighborhood with the gospel. I had no clue that Cynthia had lost a 30 something son last year and was carrying the wait of this. She with a few others had planned a basketball tournament to honor his memory and passion in life. This is where she drew me into the picture and connected me with Reginald the almost linebacker for an NFL team until he blew out his ankle or knee in college.

I am faced with the reality that God has to provide both the people resources to help make South Phoenix a better place and the financial resources to make it happen. I should trust more but at times I think I have been left out in the wilderness. Yet, every time I read the Word I am struck with the reliability of God’s Promises. As I read the story of Elisha and the widow who needed help I see God taking something very simple and using it to provide for a family in real need.

I know I have a tendency to want everything done like yesterday. Part of the excitement and adventure is seeing God put together the pieces to the puzzle. I was blessed to be part of a wedding this weekend of a young man that is like a son to me. It was amazing to see God join together two very different people representing cultures that are far apart but it is Jesus who draws them into being one.

I am learning to enjoy life one day at a time. We go for walks in the early morning often on the Rio Salado Trail that has a variety of landscape that our puppies love to explore. I want to be like these little puppies that can take off after a rabbit or bird. They are also quick to stop and smell and look around to see who has gone before them. It is too easy to let schedules and the pressure that I impose to ruin my sense of God’s presence and peace in my life. Last week while walking along this trail we saw a beaver swimming in a pond with a couple of ducks around him. God is at work especially when we don’t see it or believe it.

Trust Issues

I am known to like to do lots of things to both challenge myself and those God brings into my life. I believe that life is to be lived by doing not sitting on the couch playing ps3 or surfing the net. This last week has been interesting as I have seen God work in both great situations and also sad situations.

Last night I had one of my ‘moms’ ask to talk to me while we were cleaning up after the teen night in the park. Her daughter usually commands my instant attention and I ‘put her off’ a little while we finished cleaning up. I assumed that her mom was going to complain about something or ask a favor for her daughter who tends to be hyper active. Instead I was shocked as she shared grim news, she has a large tumor in her abdomen that will require surgery. This is going to happen like next week and she will be off of work for at least 6 weeks. She has worked as a hotel maid for the last 20 years.

Just a few hours before this, I get a text from one of my teens asking me to talk to her parents. She is a good kid but definitely coming into her own and pushing the boundaries. I know that she has been grounded a bunch and have strict parents. The great news is that I got to talk to her mom and dad who are actually cool people who grew up in the hood and totally understand the challenges that face today’s young teen. The reality for this teen was that she did something that she deserved to be grounded for and was giving her parents some attitude. I agreed with them that she should be grounded and learn to listen and follow her parents guidelines and also mine. It was scary talking to her parents at first but realized that we are on the same side for their daughter.

My life is full of surprises like having too many people to go on our Sedona trip. The last thing I wanted to do was say no to two of our Mexican Moms who should be able to come. One of the other mom’s drives her daughter and a friend to drop off and I quickly ask her to come drive and guess what she drives and there was room for all 45 to enjoy the cool water and amazing red rock of Sedona.

God is faithful and trustworthy!