Neighbors

This last week has been tragic for our neighbor across the street. She came over frantic last week about someone ‘keying’ her car. It didn’t make any sense. There wasn’t anyone who they could fathom that was mad at them or had cut off on the freeway. My wife has this warped sense of justice so she was ready to go out and attack the culprit. Obviously the keyer isn’t going to walk up and identify himself or herself.

My experience with people who do crazy stuff is that they really don’t think much about the impact it has on the person they are hurting or the family that has to pay or fix their destructive action. I am beginning to see that way too many people have anger issues that come out in different ways, i.e. keying someone’s car or stealing something like my iphone. I am surprised at the people that God brings me around. I have a new friend who also hangs out at Starbucks who also works with at risk youth. He has to make reports on a daily basis. We talk a lot and I see so many parallels between what we are doing.

Yesterday afternoon the neighbor again banged on our front door, no doorbell but we do have the dogs, which always alert us to danger. So the neighbor lady had an even worse tragedy this time. The same group obviously had come back and this time decided to slash all of the tires on their truck and one of their cars. One of their sons was home but didn’t hear anything. The police were out taking information. Now they are putting their truck and car in their garage. I am so thankful that our cars haven’t had this happen to them yet. I know I would be outraged if this were to happen.

The real question is how do I respond to random acts not of kindness but violence? I live in a nice neighborhood that is surrounded by older neighborhoods. The reality is that violence isn’t exempt from our street. I know that it is easy to make platitudes about others circumstances until I am faced with someone that slashes the tires to my van. The sheer cost of replacing tires for any vehicle means that Christmas isn’t going to happen, at least for gifts under the tree.

I know that with my kids it is too easy to see the anger or temper based response to this would be to get revenge. Let’s go find these ___________ and teach them a lesson. So how do we teach someone a lesson or do we? I know that there is a side to me that calling the police is a step in the right direction. I also know that parking my car in the garage or putting my computer stuff up vs. leaving out is another step. I know that I live away from thinking that consequences are real at times. As we journey together in doing mercy work and community development in South Phoenix, it is so important to show the result of both being pro-active and reactive. The damage that comes out going after someone is huge. It is one thing to repair the damage done to a slashed tire. Yet, to see someone stabbed or shot is horrible and doesn’t have to happen. Yeah, I know the mindset of some is that I can always get stitched up or the doctor can sew me up.

Christmas is an amazing example of how God has dealt and is dealing with our temper and anger issues. Jesus comes to create a means for us to resolve the anger problem deep down inside. I know that most don’t understand that being reconciled to God is the first step to be restored to broken relationships. I know that it is really impossible to go back to someone who has stubbed you and forgive him or her. Yet, this is exactly what God has done for us through Jesus’ coming, living for us and dying for us. I have been around some people who are desperate and it isn’t necessarily their fault. How they choose to deal with their circumstances is their choice.

I know that violence only begets violence. So as I say to my kids/teens the first step is to not make a fist but reach out your hand to give a high five or shake as the beginning of a new relationship based upon grace and mercy not getting even.