Thursday, April 18, 2013

Old Dogs Can Learn New Tricks!


Is it possible for Dave to actually do something he’s never done before and be willing to start from the bottom of the pile instead of always being someone who thinks he’s on top of everything? I know that in today’s tough job market to find a great job with equivalent pay for a 50 something is almost impossible. We live in a society that is consumed with the youth cult. Everyone you typically see in most media contexts are young and beautiful. Yet, I have been humbled to see how God chooses to use 80 and 90 year olds to rock the world.

Today is my father in-law’s birthday and his b-day wish is to jump out of an airplane. I know Anne’s mom is struggling with this decision. It is ok to go on a cruise this next week and enjoy the waves and ocean breeze but forget someone who is 80 plus putting on a chute and jumping out at 10K feet. His kids all pitched in for this to actually happen.

My real point today is to focus on my Anne, who isn’t an old dog regardless of her approaching the big 60 but to boast about her ability to do something totally outside of her box. Anne has be such an amazing helper in everything I have done over the last 30 plus years of our lives together. I have been the one to move and have her come and be my faithful assistant.  She has always been such a willing partner in ministry and family over the 40 years we have been together.

I know that deciding to go into the CPE Program, chaplaincy program, at Banner Good Sam was something that was rather touch and go at first for my Anne. She has lived in my shadow and never viewed herself as being a professional, in spite of the fact that she has the educational background, a masters degree and 30 years of doing spiritual care in many different contexts. I know that it is easy to be someone who is quick to judge or critique another rather freely. Now the circumstances have reversed where your group now speaks freely about how you need to change, rethink your theological view of everything and then be thrown into the middle of the trauma unit is overwhelming. I know that my tendency and Anne’s is to try to fix everyone and not practice the spiritual presence of God before a word is said. Anne has had to face the trauma of watching a little baby die in their mother’s arms. She has been with someone who was just told they have a terminal disease.

I admit that I have a delicate ego that doesn’t want someone to beat me up too often. I can’t fathom having a panel discussion each week that reviews how you are doing with your pastoral care of a variety of patients. I know that there isn’t a real manual that preps me for knowing how to stretch someone who has been raised to do nada. I also know that some people are very delicate in their nature and others are like bulls that you have to hit in the head with a 2x4 to get their attention. So I’m so thankful for Anne’s supervisor, who has become a close friend and mentor, who has helped her become more confident in her our own giftedness.

I have enjoyed our walks at the early hours and late hours of the day where we will reflect together about how to deal with the brokenness in our family, our community and her work. I have benefited so much from her learning experience that it has helped me be more out there and willing to step up and not over react or under react to daily circumstances. I know it is easy for us to be competitive and think that it is all about winning, this is mostly a guy thing and miss out on the blessing of doing life together.

I do love my old dog, Graham, who is such an incredible friend. I can’t imagine not having our Graham around. Yes, as Anne would say, I have my new mistress, Freckles but I know that our big puppy will help Graham stay active and have a special friend. My puppy will help me and my old dog stay young beyond our true years. I’m so thankful that my Anne was willing to go into this program being the elder lady, she definitely doesn’t look it and impact everyone around her including her old hubby – me! I’m so proud of my Anne J

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