I was surprised to get a text from a close friend who had
recently moved outside our common Phoenix neighborhood that said my last blog
on racism was an honest post. He applauded what I had written. He’s an African
American who is a pastor and also Army Reservist. I told him to wait until I
blogged next about how all of us to a certain extent are responsible for
stereotypes that cause racism on all sides. As I walked into a Starbucks close
to my in-law’s retirement complex I was surprised to notice that I was the only
‘white’ guy getting coffee that morning. The stereotype for most Starbucks
would be affluent neighborhood where there would be lots of baby boomers
getting their brew early on a Saturday and can afford to pay $5 for a cup.
I have always been a fan of Bill Cosby both on the T.V. and
also on the stage. He is someone who understands the problems that are rampant
in his racial group. I can remember listening; this was before YouTube or iTunes,
on L.P.’s on my dad’s fancy stereo. We would sit around and just listen to his
clean family humor. I can remember twenty years plus later hearing him share
his story of being someone that had experienced racism in his own family. The
loss of his son had truly impacted his life. The reality that he talked about
was that the worst enemy in the Black Community is the community itself. I have
spent a good part of my life living in diverse communities where it is so easy
to feel on edge if you happen to be in the wrong part of town at the wrong
time.
I can remember the first time I saw a bigger than life
Hispanic or African American guy walking their dog, albeit a micro dog,
Chihuahua, in a park close to my house. I had to be honest that I was a little
or a lot afraid to walk my dog in the same area. Sure over time I have come to
know these guys as normal people who love their families, their dogs and our
commonly shared park, canal trail, QT or Circle K around the corner. I know
that I choose to shop and eat at one of the local Hispanic Markets, Ranch
Market, all of the time. It isn’t unusual to be the only non-Hispanic in the
market or waiting in line to get a fruit drink or quesadilla. I chuckle because
of it being summer I have a tan so I fit in better which means the person waiting
on me ends up speaking in Spanish. I admit that I get a sense that I don’t
belong there, yet unless I choose to shop there and hang out there that
stereotype will continue.
I began a journey of doing work in under resourced
neighborhoods almost 20 years ago. This began with being on a Habitat for
Humanity board. I had the privilege for almost 8 years of being either
president or chairman of the board. This meant that I did a lot of hands on
work with both making presentations, being part of builds and raising funds to
build affordable houses for the working poor. I can remember one of the first
questions that I would be asked was whether this was a hand out that promoted
laziness and living on welfare. This would quickly bring my HFH story about building
partnerships that promoted empowering people not enabling people and ultimately
sees HFH as being a hand up not a hand out.
The primary target group of HFH, in my neighborhood, was
primarily Hispanics with a few African American families. I loved overseeing
the different houses where volunteers would come a few times a week to partner
with the Habitat Families to build their houses. I especially loved being part
of the dedication ceremonies where I would have the privilege often of giving a
short talk about HFH and the reality that this house has now become a home. What
I loved about this type of partnership is that it brought people of different
backgrounds both ethnic and socio-economic to make a difference. The founder of
HFH would talk about the theology of the hammer. His simple point was that when
we focused on helping someone in the context of a partnership that often our
differences were forgotten as your hammered pushed the nail into the stud.
I was involved with a local non-profit in Chandler over a
5-year period of time. Its’ purpose was to help at risk youth stay off the
streets and not become a statistic because of the gangs in this rough
neighborhood. The non-profit’s success was tied very much to the involvement of
a large high tech company in the larger area and the city itself. Again one of
the key lessons I was learning when it came to see marginalized neighborhoods
change was having partnerships be at the forefront. Habitat’s vision of being a
hand up not a hand out was very much part of this group’s mindset also.
I can remember when I first considered doing community
transformation work and visited a mercy church in St. Louis I was confronted
and confounded with a good friend’s admonishment to understand the need to see
racial reconciliation as a high priority. I was taken back at first and
wondered what did I do to cause racism? I had again been raised in a family
where I was taught from birth not to judge a person by the color of their skin,
educational background nor size of house or type of car they drove. Yet, as I
listened to my friend unfold what is entailed in racism I came to understand
that I represent a society, a governmental system and a church that has
promoted racism by choosing to be bystanders. The reality check for most that
attend church is the most segregated time on the face of the earth is on Sunday
mornings.
I struggle with knowing how to make a difference in the life
of one of my little guys who has grown up without a dad, much if any positive
influence and then have this sense because his or her skin color is different
from mine that there is something wrong with them. This becomes even more
difficult when I have volunteers that help out thinking that if only they could
transform these kids to be like them that all of their ills in their cultural
group would vanish. The reality is that racism is both a by-product of the
specific cultural group and those outside. It is easy to believe a stereotype
about yourself instead of fighting against it. It is also my fault when I
assume that a person of color has more a tendency to be bad than my kids.
What are some simple steps to take to start tearing down
racism? I think choosing to make friends of different racial and socio-economic
backgrounds is key. I think it is time that we recognize our prejudices and
start doing something to promote multiculturalism in the workplace, in our
neighborhood, in our church and through our actions. I think it is an amazing
adventure to learn about someone else’s cultural background, enjoy some of
their traditions and especially eat some of their exotic food! I know that
having done construction work between college degrees and grad degrees it was
too easy to assume that because I was the non-Hispanic or non-Colored foreman
that my way was the right way. It didn’t take too long for me to be taught by
my non-white counterparts that they knew just as much as I did about concrete
work or maybe even more.
I know that it isn’t popular today to study history,
especially U.S. History. Yet, until we understand what happened to Native
Americans, African Americans and the Japanese the past will continue to not
only haunt us but repeat itself. I am quick to tell those involved with doing
community work that talk is cheap and actions speak louder than words. I know
that racial profiling is a hot topic today between different terrorist attacks
and the ongoing struggles with understanding how to resolve the immigration
issue. So today is a great time to start attacking stereotypes that are wrong
and choose to make a friend who has a totally different life story. If we
choose to be bystanders in the race war than it will continue to impact our
society, culture and the world around us.
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