Extro or Introvert?

I’m presently reading a book that is a must for anyone in leadership. We live in a time where the assumption is that all leaders have to be loud, aggressive, persuasive and blessed with incredible looks. The reality, which most don’t want to admit, is that there is much more that goes into great leadership than whether you are an extrovert that thrives off of being around people that you can control and ultimately direct or channel in your way.

What is incredible is that the author of this book comes out of the finest school and is able to help those of us that struggle with whether we have to always be in a group settings to be affective in our calling. She does a rather amazing amount of research that clearly shows that even in the Evangelical Church of Today or the proverbial mega-church that everything is totally geared towards the extrovert and the assumption is that it is unspiritual to be an introvert. There must be something missing in your DNA or faith because you aren’t out shouting to your neighbor about God.

It is even more interesting when the author looks at different areas of business and technology only to discover that much of the business model of today, brainstorming or group sessions, limit creativity and typically don’t work. She spent a lot of time looking at the individuals who helped birth the technology movement in the 70’s and 80’s. The truth of the matter is that all of them were nerds who felt suffocated when put into a group setting or an open office context but thrived when left alone in their little world. Apple wouldn’t exist if it weren’t for this type of alone innovation the WOZ did to make the personal computer a reality.

The author spent time with a pastor who struggled with whether there was something seriously wrong with him because he didn’t thrive on large crowds, loud rock music or mega-programs. He instead received his energy from being alone, reflective and able to think which prepared him for being around his church family ultimately. The author in her own context saw her difficulty of fitting into the typical business school model of the Ivy League Schools. What if there is another way to do church, business or family where you don’t have to be a loud mouth and instead are someone who actually is able to show grace and understanding as the methodology that makes both life and business happen?

I can think of so many families I have been around where you have kids or a parent that is an extrovert attempting to make their siblings or spouse be like them? The challenge is that there isn’t necessarily a preferred personality profile for anyone. The opportunity is for you to discover who you are with your particular background, likes, interests, dislikes and sense of calling. I know that my one brother doesn’t appreciate the crowd that lives around me in the work that I do. Just as my professor brother understands the class face he has to put on to teach but much more appreciates being in a multi-cultural context that suits his nature.

My hope as I do work in a under resourced neighborhood is that I wouldn’t gravitate to the extroverts because they are perceived as being doings and mover and shakers. As I have enjoyed writing over the last 5 years I see the benefit and necessity of alone time. I can’t read with multiple sounds around me so no I don’t have my IPod cranked up or the TV blaringly loud. Yes, I have to confess that my amazing wife has influenced me to understand the blessing of taking a Sabbath rest where I’m able to disconnect and recharge.

I forgot to mention the book I'm reading is; 'Quiet, The Power of Introverts In A World That Can't Stop Talking', by Susan Cain.