Life is???

I usually walked with my Anne in the mornings, unless I have a Matt’s Breakfast meeting. It always gives us a chance to be out in the open and enjoy our area’s beauty. Some times it is a quick walk with a few of our fellow walkers or joggers out. It can also be crazy when the horses are out being ridden and our dogs go wild. This morning it was a time of sharing and tears. I know that at times my adult kids may think that I am either only into my own things or might care but not know how to show it. I don’t think our walk; discussion, tears or prayer time solved any of the ills of the world. Yet, I think it help put perspective on the bigger picture of life.

This last week there were three different shootings in our larger neighborhood area that resulted in the loss of six lives. This always has a ripple effect on everyone because there is always someone who knows someone who I know. One of these families lives in our Habitat Community where we live, work and play all of the time. What happened to cause someone to actual take another person’s life? I know at times I get annoyed with my son or someone else around me. I have high expectations at times that are a by-product of me being raised by a dad who demanded respect and your attention. I am learning that God has a different timetable and plan. I too am seeing that not everyone has my passions or understanding of life. So what do you do when doesn’t like what you do, doesn’t understand what you do or is likely to clash with you most of the time?

I know that in the past I would just avoid someone like that or be confrontational with no resolve either. I am beginning to accept the reality that I can’t be best friends with everyone or even friends. I know that even members of my own immediate family or larger family I can be at odds with at times. I guess I am an idealist at times and also a pragmatist too. So how do we face broken or less than desirable relationships? I see that I have to be the first to recognize that I’m broken and lots of my relationships aren’t going to work because I can be a jerk and am selfish.

My real purpose in writing this is seeing that reconciliation is going to be an ongoing part of life. There is no way around this what so ever. It takes time, is messy and hurts when it comes to resolving issues from the past. I so much want to have great relationships with everyone around me and not feel tension. Yet, tension is going to be there because we are walking through a lifeline mine that does explode more often than one expects.

The good news, which I so much need to hear, is that God’s grace, mercy and love are more than capable of fixing my wicked heart and the hearts of those around me.