Wednesday, January 6, 2016

Important Life Lessons!

I was shocked and impressed when one of my teens posted on FB the following learn how to pic that stated; learn how to have fun without alcohol, talk without cell phones, dream without drugs, smile without selfies and love without conditions. What was more interesting the same day was listening to a 35 year old friend talk about the difficulty with his generation’s inability to enjoy life without alcohol, social media, smartphones, being selfish and learning to live for others. I got a good laugh because I could be this guy’s dad and totally agreed about the selfish nature not just of his gen but mine also.

I know that with the college football big game and Super Bowl around the corner the major beer companies would die if everyone would discover that you could actually enjoy a game without getting sloshed! Yet, the challenge for many is that we don’t know how to live without entertaining ourselves with alcohol, drugs, social media and have lost the ability to dream about a better life that has less to do with your income than how your life impacts the lives of others.

So how does someone learn to live life in the truest fashion without all of these various crutches or aids? I can’t fathom what would happen in my life if I were forced to stop texting or e-mailing and had to actually talk to someone face to face? Regardless of someone’s age, social status or life interest we all share the common need to be noticed, loved and appreciated. Yet too often the celeb, sport’s figure or big time CEO type leaves the impression on the normal person that something must be missing in our lives because we aren’t like them.

I recently finished listening to a TED talk; I confess this wasn’t as good as being there in person.  The person who was featured, Susan Cain, shared her life story about the struggle of feeling left out of the world of extroverts because she would rather read a book and be alone than in a crowd of loud mouths. I will always remember the first night in my college dorm when I choose not to go out with a few HS friends who got totally smashed. There was this loud banging at my dorm room door at one am with a good friend who was too inebriated to put his key in his door. Looking back my friend laughed at my sleeping attire when in reality I was the one that got the chuckle out of the effects of over consumption of beer that night.

Ms. Cain’s story on this TED talk helped highlight our need as a society to continue to push the one size fits all mindset, especially when it comes to the perception that real leadership can only happen if you are the loud mouth pushy type of person. Her story highlighted the fact that it’s possible to make it to the top without being the pushy loud mouth, drinker type, self absorbed type and instead show that it’s possible to care for someone, who is different from you without attempting to make them be like you.

So what would actually happened if for a day or two all of us decided to put down the beer can, smart phone and choose not to post on FB, Twitter or Instagram? Is it possible to go for a day without doing a selfie? I can’t fathom the impact that the upcoming generation would have on my generation if they actually made the effort to visit a parent, grandparent or friend instead of texting! I know that one of the common complaints of my better half is not taking the time to communicate in a face-to-face fashion.

What has been hilarious is watching one of my teens that is living with us all of a sudden put down his iPhone 6s Plus and look at my invertebrate Salt Water Tank. All of a sudden he’s entered into a totally different world. I get this text from him about the fact that the sea anemone was moving or that one of the fish appeared to be missing. It’s fascinating to watch him be absorbed in the world of the sea below us.

So I believe it is possible to learn how to live without all of the high tech gadgets for at least a few minutes and discover the beauty of a smile without alcohol and being stimulated by a great conversation as someone loves you just for who you are instead of trying to make you conform to their image. J




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