Thursday, December 13, 2018

Is it possible to turn a bad day into a better day?

I know that everyone, myself included, have genuine bad days! Yes, where everything seems to go south regardless of what you choose to do. Last night we went to an incredible light display with a group of kids and teens. Sadly, one of my interns initially had car troubles and then worst of things she has a mishap and hits the curb and gets a flat tire. Thank God for AAA and their emergency service!

So, what can you do when a bad hair morning turns into a spiraling ready to jump off a cliff day? Holiday season is the worst time for those of us that struggle with depression, the loss of a loved one and the difficult reality that you’re alone for Christmas or thanksgiving. I was having a chat with a young friend who unfortunately has found himself in a ‘funk’. Regardless of what he does he has little if any motivation to do anything. It’s so easy to make an excuse when you’re out of it and soon you notice your life has gone from being in the ‘stall’ mode to be in the descending reverse mode. Oops, no one has to live this way, yet, without being able to acknowledge you’re in a perpetual bad day syndrome life isn’t going to get better. 

I have another friend who does struggle with SMI and continues to face his life circumstances both good and actually horrible. The difficulty, which my friend would admit, is that it takes a few great friends to walk with you in life to overcome the bad, bad, bad type of days. He had something horrible happen that was a combination of first time doing something and the ineptness of a clerk creating a nightmare situation. The good news, which does make your day or week rock, is that friends can help big time. The path to turning a bad day into a better day requires an openness to include someone in your impossible seeming situation. 

I have another friend who’s in a tough situation where he’s unemployed and it would seem that the odds are against him in making his life turn around. Regardless of how hard he tries, he’s learning after being incarcerated, stuff happens. Yes, the car breaks down, cell phone dies, you do ‘stupid stuff’ and you can be embarrassed to ask for help. I know that it’s so easy to say what matters most in life isn’t how many times you fall but how often you get back up and face the stuff that stinks in life? 

I just recently finished a book on how to face anxiety in life. It has a rather foul title, F…. Anxiety, yet, the author, a PhD, wants to connect with real people who are dealing with the s….. in life. I know that as a pastor and someone that does believe in super natural help that there isn’t a 1, 2, 3 solution to any problem and that depression and thoughts of harming yourself are sadly more part of our cultural than any want to face. 

I have a good friend who works with families that struggle with real life circumstances. She connected me with one of her friends who is a social worker. My new friend and her husband had chosen to help a teen who they had known for a long time. He had aged out of the ‘system’ and needed a place to live that is more than a group home. It was so exciting to meet someone who had intentionally chosen to be a positive influence and help to someone that could ultimately be out on the street. Yet, the tragic reality is that there are too many that need this type of positive attention NOW. 

I’m learning to listen more, ask for help more and not be afraid to speak up when I see someone isolated and hurting. The more important element for me is to have other resources that I can point a friend to pursue to have a better day. 

Yes, it’s time to realize that having a bad hair day is rather foolish to let ruin your day. The choice all of us make each day is whether we are serious about being in LIFE and can text a friend, make a call to a hotline or more importantly dial 911. 

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