My Son - The Graduate!

I know that with graduations approaching for many from kindergarten to college the next few weeks with be special family times. There will be lots of pictures and many family gatherings to honor those who have finished. I will always remember the 8^th grade graduations of one of our teens. She so much wanted to have a limo, yes a stretch limo, for her graduation. I tried to explain to her that I had graduated on all different levels and never had a limo. Yet, she was bound and determined to get that limo. Fortunately for her she had a few friends whose parents ‘popped’ for the limo.

As we are watching the graduates file out of this 8^th grade ceremony there was this lone white stretch limo in the parking lot. Yes, this was it; our teen and her friends were going for the ride of their lives. I had tried to explain that limo’s cost hundreds of dollars for an hour so usage would not be for the week but an hour. The excitement came to an end when the limo ‘dumped’ them off at AZ Mills outside of Gameworks. I soon received a call asking for some extra spending money for the evening at the mall.

I know that as this Friday approaches it is a very special day for me. I’m the one who should get a limo for my son who will get his degree from ASU. This has been a long road for my Jon. He really didn’t want to do school up until recently. I can totally understand in today’s world context that college produces a huge amount of debt that isn’t likely to be paid by the low wages of entry-level positions. I have a few friends who went to private schools and are paying more for their loans then their rent or mortgage.

The real reason for blogging about graduations is to say that they are a very important ‘rite of passage’. I know that we argued or discussed heatedly whether it was important to walk and actually go through the ceremony. I know that for many it isn’t really a big deal. It’s more of a hassle then it is worth. I know that we were thrilled when we persuaded our Jon to walk that this would be an awesome memory regardless of whether the ceremony is 2 or 3 hours. Yeah, we have endured a 4-hour grad school ceremony in Flagstaff a few years ago.

I am so proud of my son because he has not only stuck it out but finished like a champion. He has become the school machine that is up for doing it and his goal has become getting A’s not just getting by. I know that the unfortunate part of graduation this year will be those who can’t be there. I know that this is a real disappointment for all of us. My mom is in heaven, my dad isn’t capable of doing stairs or sitting for hours, Anne’s mom isn’t well and Grandma Mary is getting old and isn’t up for flying by herself. Yet, the one person, besides family, who is important to our Jon, will be there, Freddy!

Freddy was this little guy who we met in the 80’s when we worked in San Diego at a downtown church. I can remember wondering if this little kid would finish high school forget attending college. We were very fortunate to have Freddy be part of our family when we adopted Jon and Julie. We were bound and determined that Fred would attend college and actually graduate. So he lived with us for a couple of years while we lived in Walnut Creek. He became a big brother, not really because he is like 5’ 2” or something, but a best friend of our Jon. I will remember my Jon as initially being a midget who believed he would never grow and have no hope of ever being a sports guy.

So when Freddy flies in on Thursday night it will be a reminder of the path that both he and Jon have taken to understand how important it is to not only finish the ‘race’ but finish giving it your all. I know that my son has been raised in a college family where there have been expectations by his parents and grandparents to step up and do it. I think all teens go through phases where they totally do the opposite of their parent’s wishes. Jon was not any different than myself, yeah I did college but chose to get married at the age of 20 and Anne was 19. I know that my father in-law really believed that we would never graduate and have 10 kids.

I can honestly say that we finished our undergrad and also did grad school together as a young couple that was initially viewed as being ‘brain-dead’ for going against everyone’s advice. I know that Jon has become the great example to our urban youth about focus, stay the course and finish with the cheers of the crowd! We are proud of our Jon’s accomplishment and know that he has a great future ahead of him as he experiences the joys and defeats of normal life. Yes, YOU DID IT JON! WE LOVE YOU!