Do you really have time for a pity party?

Do you ever feel sorry for yourself to the extent that your life goes on hold? I had a moment today where I interrupted someone’s pity party and did I catch it from this individual. You would have thought that I had ruined his or her life and was the worst person in the world. I get it that everyone needs a break from the action, the question is whether there’s a better time to flake out or veg, especially if it means missing work, school or a family function?

I will be the first to admit that I might act like I’m doing great when in reality I’ve had a bad day or not so great a week. The essence of the matter is whether you use your pity party to grow and get better or whether it breeds the blahs, pissed off mood or mad at the world mindset. The difficulty with my friend and myself today is that I’m totally in control of my mood, choice to step up or sit down or pout! I know that there’s a lot more to an individual’s emotional balance but the simple fact is that for most of us we choose to quit and let circumstances control us.

I know everyone has heard the old adage when life throws you a lemon you make lemonade! I very much appreciate the following quote by Wayne Dyer, “with everything that has happened to you, you can either feel sorry for yourself, or treat what has happened as a GIFT.” Can you imagine treating a bad day as a gift? I have another friend who got fired and then regained their job because of self-advocacy. Yes getting fired became a gift where this individual was able to express themself in such a fashion that it became a learning opportunity.

Dyer continues to say, “everything is either an opportunity to grow or an obstacle to keep you from growing. You get to choose.” I know that life can be almost impossible for many today! I lost my mom to cancer almost eight years ago and my dad to dementia two years ago. Everyday I’m so thankful that both of them taught me by their example not to wallow in pity but to get up off the couch and do something with my life. So what has to happen for someone to view his or her mess, brokenness or heartache as a gift?

I know that often I might get rebuked for being in someone else’s business that equates to trying to stop the pity party from being ongoing misery. The most difficult thing in life is to ask for help when you are hitting bottom and also to help someone that you see has crashed and burned. I would rather have someone give me a swift kick in the behind then be left to sob alone. Much as I would hope my friend today would eventually say thanks for helping stop his or her misery.

Life is such an amazing gift how could anyone waste even a moment feeling sorry for themselves? So let’s see the bad hair days, lousy weather, flat tires or I’m pissed at someone as an opportunity, i.e. gift, to touch someone else who is on the sidelines of life to step up and enter into the adventure!