Godly Common Sense

I have been doing a series on Proverbs 14 looking at Godly common sense. I know that we live in a society where common sense seems to be a thing of the past. Too often you hear people saying things that you can't believe. I'm listening to one of the more quiet songs of one of my teens yesterday and it was highlighting, I'm not sure the lyricist saw this as positive, the statistics of today's world i.e. how long before you dump your present live in because we don't believe any more in marriage or conflict resolution. Reality check is that this is what comes across on social media, which typically is negative and definitely worse then 'trash' talk on the Basketball Court. 

I was raised by a mom, that drilled into me that if I didn't have anything nice to say then don’t say anything. I know that it is very difficult for most, myself included, not to respond to negative talk with something similar when reacting. I know it is relatively easy to make demands on others but not as easy to follow through yourself. My mom also made it a habit to say ‘practice what you preach’. My problem, which I think is still the norm today, I believe is an attitude of ‘Whatever’ or who cares. I grew up in the rebellious days of the later 60’s and early 70’s. Yes I can remember Woodstock and protestors from the Vietnam War.

I have intentionally chosen to work with people, kids and teens who don’t necessarily understand the simple concept of saying thank you or being appreciative of help. My mom would again say in different ways don’t bite the hand that feeds you. The opportunity for me is a learning curve of better understanding how to motivate and help my New City family and friends to be more willing to grow up by stepping up and taking responsibility for their situation. I know that today’s economy will make it even more unlikely for those less educated and unwilling to work hard to find employment. This unfortunately creates a dilemma for most of my kids that they will be stuck in a situation where they need help and the question is whether they will appreciate a ‘hand up’ and then do the same for a friend.

Don’t get me wrong I do have many around me that understand the importance of talking and living in a way that reflects what I call Godly Common Sense or Wisdom. It doesn’t take a PhD to get this because it isn’t about how much you know but how you use what you know. It is too easy for many to react and become bad talkers because of those around them that have more to put them down. I’m so proud of a mom who is going back to school and working towards her G.E.D. This is a huge amount of work and very humiliating. I’m helping her with understanding the mechanics of writing. I’m no expert and have learned how to write after a few undergrad degrees and grad school. I have been blessed to have a wife who has an incredible gift of imagination and the ‘knack’ to write. I also have a daughter who takes after her mom that has also helped me better see the ‘how to’s’ of becoming a writer.

My point to most of my group is that the old adage is true, ‘sticks and stones do break bones but words also do just as much damage.’ My hope is to help those in our community to see that your choice of words, how you say those words and what you are trying to communicate is key to having good relationships. Yet, if we are going to live in a culture where we always have a come back that is just as foul and bent on hurting then eventually all of this will come back to bite us. Solomon was so right in Proverbs 14:3 where he says that foolish talk ultimately becomes a rod that hurts us. The only way this is going to stop or change is when we are around those that live out Godly Common Sense and respond with kindness and grace. I know that wisdom is living out the truth that is seen in Scripture and the lives of those who know God. The challenge is that I’m good at talking about all of this, but not great at following through and not allowing the trash talk to get me.

So I have to admit that when someone responds with an attitude of gratitude that I am more apt to show kindness back to them. Yet, when someone makes a condescending response I’m ready to walk away from them. I know that being right or getting my way isn’t what it is about. It is difficult to know how to respond in a difficult situation without choosing to communicate with someone that pushed you the wrong way. I’m proud of one of my interns that shared her fight with her roomie and ultimately had to ask for help from her R.A., which meant she got called out.

As I told my rowdy group last night in church that they have a choice to make. You can continue to be a trash talker type of person or you can ask God for help to teach you how to be someone that sees the positive and speaks in a healing and helping fashion. My would also say it takes way more energy to frown then to smile, yet, most of us walk around with frowns. Time to ask God for help with common sense through reading and meditating upon Proverbs.