I know this will sound horrible but on rare occasions I
actually chuckle or delight in the misfortune of others. Last night we had
taken a large group of kids and teens skating for spring break and St.
Patrick’s Day. What this meant was you had almost 500 youth in a rather small
setting. It was only a matter of time before someone got touched, pushed, given
the evil eye with someone reacting. I was totally shocked that my group, which
usually gets in trouble, went the entire night without any complaint. What
caught me off guard was a real fight between two younger teens that got the
attention of all 500 in the skating rink.
Yes, I know that some adults are shocked to see their Susan
or Janie actually punch each other and pull hair or scratch. It actually took a
few minutes before the adults in the teen’s group realized the severity of what
was actually unfolding. So after about 3 minutes a couple of dads jumped into
the foray and pulled the teen gals apart. A large group of rubber neckers had
gathered to take video and pics. I had to scream at one of my guys to get out
of the mess otherwise he might also end up in a fight.
The aftermath was that the manager, a good friend, was in
the middle of a group of parents arguing about who started the fight. My
manager friend is almost midget size so I felt bad for her and was ready to
stand up and help her disperse the crowd. So eventually she came to the
conclusion that it was best to avoid solving the dispute but to disperse the
crowd before the parents started swinging at each other.
I can laugh this one time because no one from group had done
something foolish or purposefully attacked someone that had pushed them or said
something. The challenge is that adults aren’t much different when it comes to
delighting in the demise of someone they might not especially like. I know that
the code of the hood or barrio is to get even, always seek revenge and make
sure you hurt the person that got you. Forget the golden rule of treating
others like you would want them to treat you. The real code is doing it to them
worse then they did it to you!
So why do I gloat on occasion when I see someone that I’m
either jealous of or actually have a dislike that I would rejoice at their
failure? I had a text from a young adult who had told me that they had car
issues and couldn’t come to help drive. Initially I thought this person was in
a car accident only to discover that they had engine trouble. This person had
been someone who ignored some of my advice and his foster mom’s advice as they
aged out of the system. This person is really a go-getter type but a little
arrogant and stubborn when it comes to learning from those around them. So for
a short time I thought to myself maybe, just maybe this person will learn it
pays to check the oil before your engine blows up.
So maybe it is a better idea to grow a sympathetic heart for
those around you that suffer misfortune regardless of the circumstances. I know
in the long run this might help me not be the brunt end of someone’s blog or a
joke that goes around.
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